I'm not carving my own life.....

I just got back from our yearly family reunion. My grandma is one of 16 kids, and all the generations gather together every Labor Day. It was such a sweet time with my big southern family! :) Lots of laughter, good food and fun! however, the only challenging aspects of these times are the infamous attempts by family members to "check-in" on my relationship status. I often hear things like..."SOOO....do you have any special friends?" wow, I could really milk that one! "Yes, all my friends are special!" ha! But I know what they are trying to ask. And every reunion can either be a time to reflect on God's goodness to me OR a time to despair that I am attending yet another reunion as a single. No boyfriend. No potential boyfriends. Let alone no kids to introduce, etc. The Lord always gives me much strength during these events...the courage to look to others' interests, ask about them, focus on them, and look away from myself. Well the reunion was going great and I actually hadn't even thought about my single state, until I got the question. You know - THE question. Only it was phrased even more interestingly than I usually hear. My great uncle looked at me and said "So, you really have never been married?" To which I kindly responded "Nope." He then followed up with "Well, have you given that any thought?" This stunned me. Of course I have! I quickly responded "well, it's not like it's something I can control! It hasn't been God's timing, etc..." His wife quickly said something about my being smart to wait, etc...Poor dear was trying to lessen the sting of her husband's remark. This question definitely goes in my "Questions never to ask a single gal" list. :) It definitely stung. But more than that, I thought it was so humorous. Because no matter how much "thought" I have put into it, this is not in my control. As Americans, we have it built into our DNA that we can create our own destinies. If we just try hard enough, we can achieve anything. And yet, as a Christian woman who believes with all her heart that my Savior is ordaining my days, this independent idea of carving my own life is simply not an option. So reflecting on this past weekend, I've been attempting to speak truth to my soul. He has ordained my days. I am living my life for Him. Whatever my God ordains is best. So while I long to be a wife and have my own family, my trust is anchored firmly in my God. And my prayer is that He would mercifully grant me these gifts. But my hope is in Him. Not in my ability to provide these things for myself (which I obviously can't!); not in the prospects around me (of which there aren't any currently); and not in the response of those around me. My hope is in the Lord. I'm not carving my own life - He is!